Friday, November 2, 2012


During my Sophomore year of college I took a Jan-term class in the UK. On the last evening of our trip one of my fellow classmates, Adam Ederwiser, decided to ask me to marry him...
Adam is tall, about 6'4". He's studying Theology and likes to answer all questions, even when his answers are incorrect. We are NOT compatible and I laughed off the request (both times).

After returning to the US I saw very little of Adam. On Valentines Day I was leaving my night class behind Adam, I had straightened my typically frizzy hair and it was pouring rain. I was focusing on getting back into the dorm before the rain ruined my hair. (My vanity will be my ruin!) When I was half-way across the parking lot Adam yelled to me, "Hey Maggie will you go on a date with me?" I was very focused on the rain and my hair at this point and the fog must have addled my thought because before I knew what I was saying I yelled back, "I'd LOVE to!" WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!!!!!!!!!

By the time I got over the shock of what I had agreed to I went to my room and had a message on the good old Facebook. After convincing him that 4:30pm was WAY too early for dinner we finally agreed on a time and a date. He replied, "I will be wearing a charcoal gray suit with purple or gold underlays, what would you like to match with."

The fated day and time came. He showed up at my door explaining that, "I was going to get a cab but it fell through, I hope you're ok with the bus."... I drove. In the car: "I would have a car but instead I have this $500 suit."

Then we got to the restaurant and were WAY overdressed. We sat down to dinner which was mediocre at best. The salad bar was wilted lettuce with canned veggies still soaking in their juices. The soup was so salty you couldn't taste anything else and the rolls were cafeteria rolls served with smart butter. To Adam it was "the best soup in our town!" So we know he has a bad taste in food, I might have been able to deal with that, then he started to chat...
1. He knows nothing about delicious cuisine
3. He told me the Muppets were better than Disney because they understood that children have a different Psychology than children.
4. He dissed country music
5. He dissed Frank Sinatra!!!

I could have handled the top 4 and he warned me that he wasn't all that good at smalltalk before we breached the topic of music. The conversation continued

Me: I like Jazz too, I really like Frank Sinatra

Adam In a pompous know it all tone: Oh Frank Sinatra is fine but not as good as people who have done COVERS of Frank Sinatra. He just doesn't have enough tension in his music. You know that really good tension...15 minutes later... Sometimes I worry that there won't be tension in eternity. You know that really good tension, but then I know there has to be. That's just the HUMBLE opinion of a MASTER in Theology.

WHAT!!!!!!!!!! At this point the waitress saved us by bringing the check. But let's backup... A MASTER IN THEOLOGY! FRANK SINATRA NOT BEING BETTER THANT THE PEOPLE WHO COVERED HIS MUSIC!!!! THIS GUY IS CRAZY! And a sophomore in an undergrad program studying Theology he is neither a Master in theology nor a master in music and therefore should not make brash comments about either!!!!!

Adam didn't talk to me much the rest of that year, but since then he has asked me to marry him once more making the running total 3 proposals in 3 years. My answer is consistently NO.

1 comment:

  1. i love you sister
    i watched little women last night and cried the whole way through thinking about the day when we are all grown up and married